Today is Bell’s Let’s Talk day. Although I don’t need to wait until today to talk about this, I thought I’d capitalize on the momentum and post today. So, let’s talk about mental health.
This post has been incredibly difficult to write. Not because I don’t want to, but because I’m having trouble finding the words and the right way to express what I want to say. What I hope is that in writing this post – and in you reading it – we’re doing our part to help break down the stigma surrounding mental health.
Mental health has played an important role in my life over the past couple of months. As DH and I continue to deal with the loss of our friend, we’ve slowly become more accustomed to talking about it and learning how to discuss what happened without getting wrapped-up in the details, instead going for a bigger picture approach and looking ahead.
Up until the day our friend passed – and even for months after – I didn’t see him as battling mental health issues. I still don’t really, but that has less to do with my understanding of mental health, and more to do with the fact that I couldn’t reconcile the man in front of me with all the signs that would have suggested something darker was brewing.
Not because I didn’t want to, but because he didn’t want us to see them.
You know what? Our friend was in the middle of a shitty situation. Yup, a really shitty situation. To him it was all encompassing and he let it define him. In the end, he chose a very permanent solution to what would have been temporary issues. Hindsight is 20/20 right?
Hindsight is 20/20 when you’re not battling the demons. Hindsight is 20/20 when you’re not effected by chemical and hormonal imbalances in your brain. Hindsight is 20/20 when you have systems to support you, carry you through and help you. Our friend will never have the benefit of hindsight, and that makes me really sad.
Most of his issues could have been resolved, and a lot of them should have been addressed by the systems that are in place to identify and prevent outcomes like his. He sought help, we did our best to provide it and get him to the support he needed. In the end things didn’t go as they should have.
I’m not in it to wag my finger or seek to place blame. Back to the original point of this post: discussing mental health to help end the stigma surrounding it.
Did you know one in five Canadians will experience a form of mental illness in their life?
With numbers like that it’s likely that someone you know has or is suffering from mental illness.
Bell has helped create a list of 5 ways you can help end the stigma surrounding mental health:
–Treat everyone with respect.
– Be warm, caring and non-judgmental.
– Challenge stigma when you see it.
– Watch your language.
– Learn the facts about mental health and mental illness.
– Help raise awareness about mental health.
If you or a person you know needs help, here are some resources they can use:
The Kids Help Phone 1-800-668-6868
For resources based on your location, the Canadian Association for Suicide Prevention has resources divided by province.
If you are a Canadian military family member, you can call the info line at 1-800-866-4546
If you’re a member of the Canadian Armed Forces call 1-800-268-7708 for 24/7 365 support.
For more information on support and services available to members of the Canadian Armed Forces click here.
The Canadian Association of Mental Health also has information of different mental health illness and resources for support.
Rosa says
Wonderfully said.
Ariel says
XO
Julie says
I can’t imagine the pain you still feel. Very good post. You’ve reminded me of a few things I’ve let slip. Thank you.
Ariel says
Thank you Julie. I try to remind myself to check in with people more often. I’ve never regretted a phone call. XO
Amanda says
Well put. Too many people try to hide their mental “illness” because of negative remarks or they don’t want to burden their loved ones. Open conversation and positive support is an awesome way to support anyone despite what state their mental health is in. Everyone can go through this it doesn’t mean you are weak. Be strong and be a voice. Let’s Talk
Ariel says
Absolutely. Well put! Thank you for sharing XO
Jennifer says
Nicely said!
My 7 year old daughter was just diagnosed last week with anxiety disorder. The diagnosis also stated that because her anxiety has lead her to have low self confidence and be extremely hard on herself, she is at a high risk for depression.
I knew my poor girl was struggling, but I also see just how strong she is to get through every day even if the anxiety is trying to cripple her. It’s hard enough sometimes to get out of bed and face the day, I can only imagine what it’s like if you are struggling with mental health issues and feel like you are alone.
Thank you for bringing attention to this issue.
Ariel says
I’m so sorry Jennifer. I wish you and your daughter all the strength in the world dealing with her anxiety and potential depression. It’s not easy. She’s so lucky to have you as a mother and as a friend. Thanks for sharing XO
Erica says
I hope you get a ton of views on this post today because it’s truly such an important topic for everyone to read. I have several loved ones who are battling mental illness, and it’s so important to be educated about it and learn the best ways to help each individual. Thanks for your courage to write about a touchy subject! I’m so sorry that you lost your friend.
Ariel says
Thank you Erica! Our friend wasn’t/isn’t the only person in my life dealing with mental illness, and it takes a lot to provide support and care for them. Thank YOU for your courage in sharing with me – here – in the comment section. XO
Karen @ a house full of sunshine says
I’m so sorry for the loss of your friend, Ariel. Thank you for talking about this topic. It’s so important. The only way to end the stigma is for more people to be open and honest about mental health, just as you’re doing. It affects so many, and yet so many feel needlessly alone.
Ariel says
Thank you so much Karen, and thank you for participating in the discussion! I hope you were able to take a minute to strike up a conversation with someone you know about mental illness and how you can help. XO
Amy says
Really well written and great tips/resources included.
Just remember, many suffering from mental health issues will struggle through it alone from fear of judgement or repercussions. Break the stigma and more people will come forward to get the help they need.
Ariel says
For sure. Our friend didn’t come forward for a long time because of the stigma and the fears he about surrounding repercussions. Thanks for sharing!
Tricia says
I know all to well what it’s like to be in that dark place and not seeing a way out! It’s hard for people to understand, especially if the person suffering from Mental Illness is good at hiding it (and believe me, most of us are!)
Every little bit helps and by you sharing your story, you are helping to spread awareness; you are helping more than you know!
Ariel says
Thank you so much Tricia! <3 By talking about it and sharing stories we're helping make a difference! It starts with us! Miss you XO
Shelley says
Ariel- you express yourself so well. I absolutely enjoyed this article, your points are spot on and sharing those numbers and links is very important. Thank you for sharing this with us, your DH and you mean a lot to your friends and I. I’ll never forget your friend- he left an impact on so many. Xoxo
Ariel says
Thank you so much shelley. Posts like this are hard to write without giving away too many details, while still saying enough to convey emotions and make an impact.
We all miss him! X0
Cynthia @ Cynthia Weber Design says
Thank you for taking the time and care to write such a wonderful informative post for us all to learn from! xoxo
heather meads says
Hugs Ariel and that’s great that we can talk about this – thanks for the resources too.
Ariel says
Thank you so much Heather. XO