I’m officially on maternity leave as of August 16th! Whatever THAT means. I’ll be answering emails, still posting to IG, and watching all my pre-planned content roll out via the scheduling features I’ve utilized. Baring any major issues, I’ll be creating content again by mid September (sporadically to meet some contractual agreements that I need baby girl for), and will be back online after Canadian Thanksgiving.
Before y’all start yelling *because I can hear you* bear in mind that my maternity leave, and what my post-baby life will look like, are drastically different than someone who is employed outside the home, or someone who was unemployed to begin with. As an independent contractor / Sole Prop owner/ CEO / Bad B*tch, how I structure my life is a little more flexible, but also fairly constrained.
Anxiety about Business
As I explained in my soul spilling post about our journey with infertility, I am legitimately terrified of what a prolonged absence will do to my business. Yes, my first baby.
I’ve spent YEARS of my life building up the brand that is PMQ for two, and in today’s economy with the constantly changing income streams, and the world of influencers, if I’m out of the game for too long I’m forgotten. My growth can’t stall, my income can’t stop, and I need to be hella active at this very crucial time of year.
Did we want a baby? absolutely! More than anything. Did we want her to happen 4 months into our house flipping? no. Is it convenient that she’s due at the beginning of my most important months as a home decor and DIY blogger? absolutely not. Are we going to make it work? You bet, and with a cute baby no less.
So here we are! I’ve worked as hard as I can up until the last few weeks, to make sure that I’ve got the big stuff done and scheduled, and am leaving myself the fun stuff (the tasks that bring me joy) to do once she’s here. I’ve never been one to do one thing at a time, and I don’t think motherhood will be any different.
Being the best Me I can Be
I started treatment for my anxiety in December right around the time I got pregnant, and it has been life changing. I’m no longer having anxiety attacks each day. I don’t experience the same flux of emotions and panic around simple issues, and I’m able to prioritize what is an actual emergency, from what is an inconvenience. There have been so many other changes that have come with my regimen, but those are for me and Dan in our day to day. It’s allowed me to be the best me I can be, and that will allow me to be the best mom I can be.
I’m feeling really good about this going into the next hormonally fuelled stage of my life, especially with all the seeming uncertainty around my business.
Motherhood in 2019 and beyond
I’ve been having some great discussions with friends lately about what it means to be a mom. I look at it as if my life was a house built with 4 pillars, a roof, and a foundation. Motherhood is just one of the pillars, it’s not the whole building. By remaining fulfilled outside of motherhood, outside of the home, and as a bread winner in my partnership with Dan – I will keep my house stable.
Side note – my house will look very different from yours! No judgment, just love.
Feminism – to me – means the choice to live my life how I want. And if that choice includes working, no work and lots of babies, or a mix of both, that’s me doing me. Conversely, I totally support you in your role and life as a woman and mother.
So while my maternity leave may not like yours, or your sister’s, or your mom’s, I would love if we could keep the judgmental comments to ourselves. I’m not here to be told I should be resting, or made to feel bad for working (like Amy Schumer was after she gave birth). I’m listening to my body, my mind, and hopefully going to do what makes me happy and fulfilled.
So if you see me labouring over a task while holding a baby, know that I chose to do it, and your messages suggesting otherwise are not supportive and don’t make me feel seen as a fully actualized person with choice and agency in her life.
Boss Ladies Who Had Babies
All that being said, I’ve got a really fun series for you guys rolling-out over the next few months. I’ve asked fellow moms and business ladies working in the world of blogging, design, and influencer marketing, to share what their maternity leave and back-to-work routines looked like.
A new one will drop each week during my maternity leave (and beyond).
Darra says
I wish you all the best when she comes into the world! Make it yours and love her in your way! Love is all she needs! With comments of what your life/leave should look like, will come comments on what her feeding should look like! Breast, bottle or both … do what feels right and do what keeps you both healthy! Take good care of yourself, and then you can take good care of her. Much love to all of you on this most magical, challenging and whirlwind journey.
Ariel says
Oh Man, people have been telling me what to do about literally everything since the day we announced ???? I don’t expect it to change! thank you for your well wishes
Jamie says
You do you boo!! You have to do what is best for your family! & we will be along on the outside to support your wonderful life change & your blog! Wishing you the safest & joyful delivery♥️ Enjoy the time off & when you return don’t ever feel bad for coming back!
Ariel says
Thanks mama ???? here’s to hoping it all goes well!
at home with Ashley says
This. Yes! It’s so nerve-wracking to take even a small step back from the crazy world of self-employment. I hope you have the most beautiful time as you transition into becoming a mother. And I can’t wait to read about these boss ladies!